Humor at Work: How to Survive a Meeting, January 14, 2009

1. How to Survive a Meeting

If you ask people on your team for their biggest meeting pet
peeves, chances are that many of them would be easily resolved
once you’ve simply taken the time to identify them.

And speaking of meeting pet peeves, U.S. Senator Harry Chapman
used a little humor to draw up a list of how to successfully
survive any meeting:

* Never arrive on time; this stamps you as a beginner.
* Don’t say anything until the meeting is half over; this
stamps you as being wise.
* Be as vague as possible; this avoids irritating others.
* When in doubt, suggest that a subcommittee be appointed.
* Be the first one to move for adjournment; this will make
you popular because it’s what everyone is waiting for!
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2. Mike’s Fun at Work Tip

If you want your meetings to be less painful and a little more
fun, then start by making sure your meetings begin on time (this
shows up as a very common meeting complaint in surveys). So in
addition to posting the start time of the meeting, also post an
ARRIVAL time for the meeting, say ten minutes before the actual
meeting begins, to build in time for socializing. And, as with any
good movie, book or presentation, begin the meeting with a strong
hook. Open with the most important agenda item, one that you know
people won’t want to miss out on. And to open on a fun note, have
everyone contribute a CLEAN joke into a bowl in the middle of the
table, have one person read out the jokes, vote on the best joke
of the lot and then award a small prize for the winning joke.
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3. Quote of the Week

“Whoever invented the meeting must have had Hollywood in mind.
I think they should consider giving Oscars for meetings: Best
Meeting of the Year, Best Supporting Meeting, Best Meeting Based
on Material from Another Meeting.” – William Goldman
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4. It’s a Wacky, Wacky, World

A boss from a company that “shall remain nameless” called a two-
hour long meeting. The topic: “unproductive meetings.”

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